Questions are a great way to start a conversation at a barbecue, a Zoom networking event, or a party.
Questions can even help you move past small talk and into deeper topics. (Which studies suggest could make you happier!)
If you’ve ever struggled with thinking up questions to get to know someone better, this post is for you!
After your conversational partner responds, keep the conversation going by making an observation about what they said.
Look through the list below and copy/paste 5 of your favorite questions into the notes app on your phone.
Then, you’ll be all set to break the ice at your next social event!
Bonus Pro-tip: Check out this massive list of 300+ conversation starters and topics or this huge list of 170+ icebreaker questions if you need help sparking conversations!
Here are 179+ questions to get to know someone better...
Wow...That was a LOT of questions!
If you can’t think of any good questions to ask to get to know someone after that list...I don’t know what to tell you.
Again, choose 5 and copy/paste them into the notes app on your phone so you’ll have some good questions ready next time you need them!
Also: If you want to learn how to have better conversations, check out this video:
Pro Tip: Use “Dig Questions” to go deeper with people!
Yeah, a huge list of questions is great, but what happens after they answer?
It’s important to be able to go deeper with people in conversation.
If you’re trying to get to know someone better, try asking one of these follow up questions:
Give them space to share more with you. This will help them open up, and will help you both find similarities.
(Just be sure to balance out the questions with a stories, observations and talking on your side or they’re going to start feeling interrogated.)
Pro-tip: Don’t ONLY ask questions.
Conversation is a two-way street.
With conversations, there are very few hard and fast rules.
However, you should try to balance questions you ask and observations you give.
If we ask too many questions, we'll fall into the "interrogation trap". (We don't want the other person feeling like they are being interviewed!)
On the other hand, if we only make observations, then it can feel like we're just talking at them rather than talking with them.
So how do we find the right balance?
Start by asking open-ended questions instead of yes/no questions or ones that can be answered with one word or phrase.
Then, mix in some observations.
Here's what that might look like in practice:
Ted: "This week has been crazy. I worked 42 hours on one project. When I close my eyes, I see spreadsheets!"
You: "Wow! You must be really dedicated to getting stuff done!"
Here, you were able to pay Ted a compliment while making an observation about his statement.
This leads to the two-way street of conversation where there is a sense of give and take between people.
Next Step: Improve your group conversations!
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